September 16, 2013

September 16, 2013

Lucia turned 3 years old on Friday!  The years have passed so quickly.  I'm infinitely proud of her.  She is such a miracle.  She wasn't even talking last year on her birthday, and now she is ahead of the game, speaking in complex sentences, putting thoughts together and forming her own opinions on everything, telling elaborate stories.  She has a wild imagination.  She is so sweet with her brother, such a loving and proud big sister.  We had a Hello Kitty cake that I am pretty proud to say I baked and decorated.  We bought her a big girl bike with training wheels - a Disney Princess purple and pink bike.  So many big girl items this year - really makes her growing up feel real and hits me so hard - big girl bed set, now bike, and oh yeah, POTTY TRAINING.  We just started the no diapers, cold turkey method at daycare and at home and it's been challenging, but I mean, why not.  We're not busy or anything.  There will never be an easy time, and she's ready to start.  She was so proud the first time she used the potty, grinned ear to ear.  She's making progress.  After work is crazy - her on/off potty, cleaning up accidents, making dinner, getting organized after work and before the next day, breastfeeding a demanding baby... but somehow it gets done.  We are a pretty tight ship.  Nerves get fried and we are stretched thin, on little sleep, but we do pretty well.  A lot of it is passing the torch, running on to the next task, shuffling back, switching.  It's not easy, it's not for the weak.  I keep telling myself it will be easier one day, but I don't know that it ever gets easier.  I think it just changes, the level of busy, the kind of busy.  And Lucia can be tough - it's her age.  She's so independent, strong willed.  I love that about her, but it's challenging at times.  She's recently entered the "why" phase which is always interesting.  She's also decided she hates baths after being such a fish I could never get her out.  I think part of it is that she wants to call the shots.  but she was so good on her birthday outing - we went to the train museum and rode on a passenger train.  Her eyes lit up, she hung her head out the window and let the wind blow her hair.  She narrated everything she was passing.  She loved it.  Then we had a picnic by the tracks for more trains and just enjoyed the lovely weather.  Lorenzo had a lot of fun being outside too, loved the fresh air.  I used the Beco and carried him everywhere which is tiring - he's no lightweight!  But he's so snuggly and with the exception of the final stretch, the drive home, he did very well.  Both kids were just so tired at that point.  The highlight included driving with most of the windows down and watching a napkin get blown back and forth (Lucia got a big kick out of this).  

But still, amidst the craziness, there is such beauty.  I love these children so much.  They are the reason I do everything, and they are the drivers of every decision.  And seeing them together, as rough as Lucia can (unintentionally) be at times, there is so much love there.  She repeatedly tells me how much she loves him and how cute and sweet he is.  She helps out at daycare with bottles and diapers.  They are already so close it's heartwarming, makes all of the stress worth it.  The way he watches her, looks at her, smiles at her.  She has his attention any time she is near.  And that is so precious.  It's something I wish I had with my siblings.  It's what matters most.  Until I see them in an hour, I will be back to work activities, but I cannot wait.  Even though it will be the same dance of chaos and it's loud and sometimes messy, everything always gets done.  I have that sense of reassurance despite the sheer insanity at times.